For most of my life, I paid little attention to my womb. I only noticed her when she was bothersome; a source of pain or inconvenience.

Like so many, I was placed on hormonal contraception as a young teen. It wasn’t until years later, exhausted, depressed, and riddled with side effects, that I finally came off it at 22. The relief was immediate and undeniable. I began researching what I’d been putting into my body and found myself on forums filled with women sharing stories of being dismissed, gaslit, and told it was “all in their head.”

Confused, jaded, and unsure of what to do next, I put the research down and continued with my busy life as a trainee teacher. But the questions never really left me.

Years passed, and still I knew almost nothing about my natural cycle. I didn’t understand my fertility, how my hormones worked, how they influenced my sex drive, my pleasure, my creativity.

It wasn’t until the birth of my daughter that anything changed. Being failed by conventional medicine throughout my pregnancy cracked something open in me. As I turned instead to natural relief and home birth I began to see just how much I didn’t know.

While trying to heal my postpartum body, I experienced debilitating menstrual pain, irregular cycles, and ovulation pain so intense it confined me to bed. I underwent invasive medical investigations only to be told there was “nothing wrong.” At the same time, I was completely disconnected from pleasure. My libido was non-existent. My creativity was dormant. My energy levels had flatlined.

The only solution doctors offered? More hormonal contraception. But something inside me said no. I knew I couldn’t go down that road again.

So I started searching. And what I found was womb wisdom.

What began as a curious toe dipped into receiving womb massage & wrapping soon became a waterfall of discovery. I began attending womb circles, workshops, trainings. I devoured books. I processed years of sexual trauma through person-centered therapy and tantric massage. I practiced self-womb massage, yoni steaming, changed how I ate, learned how to chart my cycle, monitor my fertility and connected to the powerful rhythms of my body.

One night, I sent my best friend a book that had cracked me wide open. She called me in tears:
“How did nobody tell us this?”
I replied, furious and heartbroken:
“Think about how different our lives would be if we had known this from the start.”

And then it clicked. That’s the point: A knowledgeable woman is a powerful woman.

When we know our bodies, our cycles, our pleasure, when we are attuned to our emotions, intuition, and deep wisdom, we are not easy to control. We become "difficult" women.

I am proud to be a difficult woman.

I am proud to let my womb-wisdom guide me. Proud to live in alignment with my body and intuition. I no longer people-please, self-abandon, or try to bully myself into being “better.” Through compassion, presence, and pleasure, I have come to know who I truly am.

I will never be “done” healing because healing is a spiral, a lifelong journey. But I have met pain as a friend, a protector, a guide, one that shows me what I don’t want, so that pleasure can lead me to what I do.

My perspective and methods aren’t for everyone. But I know (because life keeps showing me) that there are many women and womb-holders out there who are ready. Ready for guidance. For care. For connection, learning, and deep transformation.

It is my sacred calling to walk beside them. To share what I’ve learned. To hold space as they reclaim their wisdom, their healing, their pleasure. We work one breath, one cycle, one truth at a time.